Monday, November 4, 2013

I rejoice in being exactly what I am...

As I chatted with my best friend on the phone tonight, she remarked, "I wish my life was somewhat exciting so I'd have more to tell you. You have so much going on!" And it's true: I have a lot on my plate right now. Spiritually, I'm fighting sin hard and determined to align my heart with His. Personally and emotionally, there have been some serious upsets lately, things I never thought I'd face, and yet here I am. Psychologically, I'm in the process of going back to counseling, a good idea for those of us with psychological crosses to bear, especially during these transitional times. And truthfully, I live for Sundays, the day of rest that I gather with my church family to be restored and find peace in that Communion. 
In all of these things, I keep looking back to the Cross, to the sacrifice of Christ. I find myself trying desperately to quiet my soul and just be still in the Presence of the Creator. That's where I want to be: resting and waiting and listening for His voice. This poem speaks my heart well.

I do not know 
when I have had happier times 
in my soul
than when I have been sitting at work, 
with nothing before me
but a candle and a white cloth,
and hearing no sound 
but that of my own breath; 
with God in my soul
and heaven in my eye.
I rejoice in being exactly what I am
- a creature capable of loving God,
and who, as long as God lives,
must be happy.
I get up 
and look a while out the window.
I gaze at the moon and stars, 
the work of an Almighty Hand.I think of the grandeur of the universe
and then sit down
and think myself 
one of the happiest beings in it.

These words are so beautiful that one would think they were written by a poet of great renown. But no, rather they were written by a poor Methodist woman in the 18th century. May my heart reflect such simple joy in God as hers did.

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